August Yacking - Page 6
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 August Yacking

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Kerri
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   27/08/17, 04:54 pm

Sandy, 

Glad you put your foot down.
They need to understand you are not there
for their every need and want when they are grown.

I had my granddaughters over last night
and we watched a few movies.

The nine year old, Anna,
must have woken up in the middle of the night
and brought a bag of Cheetos into bed
while watching TV.
The open bag was still near her in the morning.
I took a picture. Anna and the Cheetos.
Will she ever forgive me when she sees it
when she is older?   Haha

Elaine, 
Your Hello with the flowers is beautiful!

Wendy,
Yes, I have been told that every family has
a loudmouth with no filter.

Martha, 
I believe, as women and mothers
that what we need matters.
Even when my children were young,
I thought if I was satisfied and happy,
I would be a better mother.

Geru,
Glad your stomach is feeling better.
Hope your Lazy boy is as comfy as it looks.
I have a burgundy colored recliner
and it makes for the best Sunday afternoon
quick naps. 

Have a relaxing rest of the day!
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   27/08/17, 07:47 pm

It is warming up around  here again ,humidity sitting at 73% and it's not noon yet .   Yuk 


Nothing much new here , quiet Sunday morning  , with the birds chirping , and a couple of squirrels running up and down the big old scotch pine tree here .
Mr. Arthritis still acting up in my lower back today ,  it's always something so it seems .


Zandranna:   I checked up on that pandemic warming on FB posting .   the post was made by " noliberals.ca " ( political propaganda ) and they fished it up from  * Global News *  known  for fake news!!  But .... it does lead to the Canadian Government site posting .  The Government posting is an update to this general  pandemic preparation . It is updated ever so often , and I guess now was the time .  It is true... that chances of a pandemic are getting bigger and bigger with all the influx from other countries we are getting .    I wont go on !! 
 Glad you had some visitors , and enjoy the upcoming dinner and card games night . Sounds like things are improving . 


Whisper;  a good day to you ..... and yes, I go to bed much much to late, and really have to make some improvements there , sleep is important for my immune system they tell me . I managed 7.5 hrs last night , but ... it's the weekend .... the traffic is slow , story will change tomorrow ... lol . 


kerri :  sounds like you had a fun time with  your Grand -daughter , ha ha ha, sure she will forgive you , but you better wait ..... lol .  My favourite colour is burgundy by the way .


I got to go and find that darn wizard . 




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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   27/08/17, 08:41 pm

That sounds like a very nice visit from Aimee and friend Sandy Smile What a difference hey!

Kerri I now know that it's important to look after my own happiness, but it sure took me a long time to figure that one out as I was brought up with the notion that a wife/mother does/goes where the husband goes and to put others before one self!
I was a happy person in my marriage till my ex became verbally violent. Had a few horrible years till I got away from that scenario but it made me bitter for a while and that I know did not go well with my kids. Took a few years for me to get back to being myself again.

Geru a lot of the news online is like the gossip magazines! Every magazine tells a slightly different gossip story but at the end of it, most are all made up and put a person through the wringer in the process. I stay well clear of that and don't buy magazines at all. I read some while waiting at the doctors office and it makes me shiver.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   28/08/17, 07:55 am

Difficult not to feel bitter Martha. I know I did for years and even now if I think too much about our divorce those feelings can still come flooding back so I don't go there any more. I refuse to let it colour the rest of my life but it does change a person permanently I think. I'm much more cynical than I used to be and I don't trust easily.

Kerri as long as she's not pulling an awful face or drooling I'm sure she'll forgive you. lol

GERU follow the yellow brick road.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   28/08/17, 11:49 am

@Kerri - I have some really fun, funny photos I've taken of the kids over the years like that. Priceless!

It's taken me a lot longer than you Martha as you know to twig on that I need to think of me as well as others, and I'm still working on it.  But I'm getting there.

I still also have a lot of biterness to work through regarding how I've been treated and spoken to this last few months.  But I don't want biterness to drive me in my new way of dealing with my girls but more having respect for myself and looking to the future relationship that I want with them all.

I'm actually cooking for more than just myself tonight which will make a change.  No idea yet if it will just be Aimee and Troy or whether Sarah will also come along because of Martyn working the evening.  To tell the truth I am still a bit angry with Sarah and didn't intend to invite her, but Aimee mentioned that "Mum" might want to come as Martyn wont be there.  We shall see.

Lovely sunny day today but I am feeling so lazy.  it seems a shame to stay in doors on the rare occasions we get a decent day, but I honestly don't feel like doing anything other than watch a box set on tele and play on the computer.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 01:48 am

Hahaha you're gonna hate me for saying this Sandy, but in the case of Aimee and Troy and then  perhaps Sarah, I would have said to Aimee "I have not invited Mum for dinner so don't like being put on the spot like this. I will invite her for dinner when I feel like it".
I know I'm a bitch like that but this is how they push what they want and not respect you enough to actually ask properly. I don't tolerate that anymore! 

Yes Wendy I too hold a grudge, I guess it's called, when it comes to that. But now instead of holding it in, I speak my mind when I want to lol. My ex knows what he did and if at times he tries to brush it aside I am quick to remind him of it, if needed be. He doesn't like that of course but that's his problem, not mine.
We get along on a friendly basis when it's the kids birthdays or Christmas and both do our best to keep it all civil and relaxed for the kids sake. But that does not mean I hold back if he tries and talks to me in his arrogant, chauvinistic manner.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 08:04 am

I haven't seen my ex since the court hearing 12 years ago and will most likely keep it that way. We've just about got to the civil via e-mail stage. We only have any contact at all because our finances are still intertwined. For years it was literally just that. The last couple of years the occasional "conversation" about the kids or grandkids has crept in. That's as far as it's going to get.

It's possible Aimee meant her mum might like to come and mend some fences too. Trying to play go-between. Then again maybe not. lol

It's a dreary, drizzly morning here. Just as well. I have to clean downstairs and do some laundry and other chores. At least I won't be tempted to go out anywhere instead.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 12:10 pm


Well, the evening was great fun. Just Aimee and Troy came along. We played 7 card brag with fake monopoly money and I lost about £14. Aimee I think went away a winner with an extra £32. I hadn't played cards for years. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

I know Martha, lol. What can I say, I'm still a bit soft.

Could be Wendy. As I have no idea if they have been discussing my change of attitude towards them or if Sarah is angry because of my change of attitude and Aimee, as you say, thought it a good way to build bridges, I just don't know.

But Sarah, can stay away as much as she likes. I'm not giving in. Either she sees me and has some respect now or she doesn't see me. It's her choice. I am passed caring what she feels or thinks towards me.

It's her Birthday on Sunday and I know from Aimee that her and Martyn are going away Saturday over night so this will be the first time ever that we haven't all got together for a birthday meal or an evening gathering to celebrate, unless of course she decides to be back for the evening and plans something.

She is so obviously not communicating with me so if she doesn't get her birthday present before or on her birthday it will be solely on her head. Although I am sure that some time in the future she will throw in my face that, she remembers a birthday that I couldn't be bothered to get her present to her on time. She has a brilliant knack of making everything my fault and not her own.

I may be doing her a dis-favour in thinking she is deliberately keeping away though. Maybe she just hasn't had time or is so involved with her job and new life with Martyn. We shall see.

I'm a bit peed off at the moment because the weather has been so nice this last few days but I still can't walk or go too far with bus or bike rides without my insides playing me up. But I am consoling myself with the thought that I now have an appointment just sent to me for a hospital appointment in the first week of November to be called in for what I hope will be the last little proceedure and I can get this bloody kidney/bladder stent out of me which will stop the discomfort and continual need to pee every 20 minutes or so.

I downloaded the box sets of Stargate Atlantis the other day so I will spend some time today watching those. I should also do a bit of housework. It's only a tiny place but it still needs the odd scrub or two occasionally.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 06:52 pm


We have another hot humid day ahead , got all the fans running again , gosh ... and no change of weather in sight  .  Sleeping is not so comfortable , as I turn off the fans in order to get to have it quiet.

Nothing much going on here, every day hum drum  laundry and housework ,errand running etc , but that is better then maybe upsetting stuff happening ... lol .  got to make a hair appointment, and an eye exam appointment  today .   

Sandy:  I am confused as to what relations Aimee and Troy and Sarah are to you . I joined here sort of in the middle of things, so I really don't know that part .  Anyhow ... glad you enjoyed the evening of card playing  ...what did you serve for dinner ?

Martha:   I hold grudges too , but in my old age ,  am speaking up for myself and not keeping it in all the time , and no one likes it I tell you  . There is an old saying that says "  it's not what your eating that makes you sick, .... it's what's eating you . *  I don't like rocking the boat , but sometimes it can't be helped .lol

Whisper:    I have been married twice , and had no  contact with either one of them personally .  
Hope your weather improves for you .




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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 07:39 pm


My About Me page (link at the top) tells who my girls are. But Sarah is my Daughter, Aimee my eldest Granddaughter (Troy is a friend of hers) and Jess is my Youngest Granddaughter. Martyn is Sarah's fella.

What I served for dinner is here http://www.zandranna.com/t366-lamb-mince-with-rich-tomato-sauce

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   29/08/17, 11:57 pm

Good afternoon & Happy Tuesday to everyone!
The weather here is too warm for me. I'm pretty much dead by 2 pm lately. I did finally get a potato salad and garlic bread made for Roomie today. I'd promised it 3 days ago LOL
I've been married twice also. No contact with the first one since signing divorce papers in 2001. No contact with the second one for over 12 years now. I'm finally not afraid of him anymore but still have zero desire to talk to him. I didn't completely get over that one until I saw his recent resume on LinkedIn.  I realized he is nothing. I'm stronger than him now. What a relief! The godz or whatever just lead me to his profile there and now I'm done! YAY
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 12:49 am

Sounds like you have a late hot summer there in Canada and lets hope you get some decent rain to put out all those fires!

Sandy it's never easy trying to figure out what goes on in ones head and I know for myself that I have excused other people's behaviour because I was being careful. That came to later bite me in the ass so to speak so these days I'm more forward and speak my mind.

My first ex, I only spoke to him twice after he just upped and left us and I have no desire what's so ever to speak to him again.
My 2nd ex and I are still legally married but have been separated now for over 12 years. He was/is the alcoholic one and these days we can have a decent conversation but I would never ever want him back in my house!

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 01:43 am

It's so good to let the past be gone♥
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 03:20 am

Hello All,
Just wanted to come in and say hello! How is everyone? Hey how is the move Sandy?

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 07:56 am

Looks tasty Sandy but I'm far too lazy to cook these days. I used to love making a good pasta sauce and freezing loads though. Glad you had a great night playing cards. As for Sarah's present I'd have just given it to Aimee to give her. That way she couldn't claim you couldn't be bothered to get it to her on time. Whether she's just busy or not it only takes a few minutes to pick up a phone and explain that. You stick to your guns.

Seems we've racked up a few exes between us. lol Martha your second husband at least had an understandable reason for his behaviour. No excuse but maybe easier to forgive. Your first and mine and from the sounds of it a few others are a different matter. Maybe we should put them all in one big cauldron and turn up the heat.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 09:38 am

I too am very lazy nowadays when it comes to cooking. I really do admire those that actually cook properly for themselves even though they live alone. I don't mind cooking for several, but cooking for one is a pain in the arse.

I did find it a piece of cake to use the crockpot for that meal though. It's easier to prepare meals in the morning when one is fresh, clean up afterwards, and then just take the lid off in the evening and dish up rather than have all the mess to clean up after eating.

I've had the crockpot for a while but only used it a couple of times. I think I will be using it a lot more now.

I couldn't give Aimee Sarah's present the other evening as it didn't arrive until yesterday but I will wrap it later so that it's ready if Aimee, or even Sarah, pops in between then and now.

I have to nip to our local shops a little later to buy a birthday card and to get some money out of the hole in the wall. I was going to incorporate it into Louies walk, but I think I will go on my own as I may feel like popping into some charity shops once I get up there and if my bladder lets me. Dragging him around those I wouldn't be able to look properly.

Weather here today is back to it's normal dull, miserable, normal, UK summer weather, but at least it's not raining.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   30/08/17, 06:24 pm

Good morning! 

When I read about what other people have lived through, divorces and husbands who leave you with kids to raise, (the worst in my opinion) I realize what a sheltered life I have lived.  I cannot imagine "breaking in" another husband...LOL  I have been married 43 years now.  My children are pretty respectful of us.  I had trouble for several years with my daughter but it was due to her own unhappiness.  Once she found Randy and they got married it was a lot better.  Then her having kids...well we know that teaches all of su a lot!!   My son, once he got past those teen years has been thankful for what we do. HIs wife is always very thankful for everything we do.    

Of course I have my mother to deal with.  I guess everything went tooo well on Sunday. My niece had her youngest baptized and then a birthday party for all 3 boys.  Two were born in Sept. one in Oct.  They live in Virginia right outside of Washington DC.  Her husband works for the Feds and he is rapidly moving up the ladder.  Anyway the next day mother calls me, did your brother make a face yesterday when your sister was taking a photo of us. I heard her say move in closer like you like her. Well my sister talks like that and doesn't mean a thing of it and mom who can't hear never misses anything neg said.  I just sighed, I thought really looking for drama???  She started back peddling, I wasn't going to do anything about it.  Well good.  Good grief. 

My other nephew joined the Army after he graduated college and he is being trained in Cyber spying, and that is all we get to know...and he is now being sent to the Pentagon to work.   I just wonder what kinds of scary things he knows.  He met with his dad last month in Tennessee and they were having a few drinks in  bar.  My brother took a photo and said how many shots does it take to get to the bottom of Government secrets.  He posted in on FB which I saw it nad didn't think it was such a good idea, he thought it was a good joke.  My nephew who was unaware he even posted it, got 3 phone calls in a few minutes telling him to tell hi dad to remove that.  Don't think we are not being watched.   

Another thing who is financing all these people who are protesting the statues?  Someone is...yesterday a woman said if you are going to remove all the white statues because they owned slaves (back in the 1800's)  then you have to remove all the black statutes or that is racist.  But that will go unheard.   

Busy day yesterday,  I went shopping with the daughter-in-law and granddaughter.  She is 2 1/2 and they are trying to potty train her. 3 trips to the potty at the restaurant and finally the last time I took her and she managed to sqeeeeeze out a few drops.  LOL  She walked really nice to the bathroom, after all this was her 3rd trip she knew where it was, but she ran ahead and weaved all through the crowd on the way back and got plenty of attention from other grandparents!  Stinker.  She wasn't too bad in the store but I NEVER let my kids out of the cart, they knew better than to ask. But Wendy let her out of mine, and we were looking at lamps.  She wanted to decorate too, she would pick out little pink lamp shades and try them on different lamps, then hold her hands out and say, "See mommy, I did that."  Stinkers are too cute.   
I wanted to buy the kids a new lamp.  They have lived in their home for 3 yrs now and she wanted an area rug for the living room and I offered to buy it when they moved in for house warming, but she was wanting to wait until they could buy new furniture.  I am sure they didn't want to ask they just went ahead and picked out a new rug when they bought the sofa set.  So I offered to buy them a lamp.   The furniture was gray and that gray can be tricky at times.  She fell in love with the lamp shade first, it was glittery and gray with a copper trim. We put it with gray lamps, white lamps, black ones, and finally I spotted a lamp that was shaped like one she had liked but the color was wrong, and it matched really good.  So we brought it home and set it up and I was worried it would look brown again like it did in the store with some of the lamps, but it was went well.  She was happy with it. She hugged me and thanked me again.   I was exhausted!! LOL    They don't make it easy buying new lamps.  You pick out the lamp, then the shade and you have to pick up the right size harp.  I had a lamp that looked sort of wanky for a long time until I finally figured out it was not the lamp or wrong size shade, I had the wrong size harp.  Good grief.  It took a while to find it all.   


We were at  store called AT Home...they use to be Garden Ridge. They had better sales when they were Garde Ridge but they sell everything for decor.  They had a huge display of Halloween things, and little Elizabeth was NOT impressed.   She shook and said scary spiders..so her mommy went up to it to show her it wouldn't hurt her, it was all play but she was not convinced.  I took her to look the Santa stuff, (yes they have it all out already) she said no, when I got close to the Halloween display on our way.  


Sewing the agenda today. I bought an outfit for a wedding we are going to Friday, and the pants were too big.  I ordered it. The thing is the size down the waist would be too small.  I also ordered a 3 piece set, the pants were huge, the jacket was slightly big but OK and then the shell was too small. I can get it on and it doesn't look tight but it feels tight. I a looking for something else to match it.  I have a strange body.  
 
Say a prayer for Texas...poor people.  


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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   31/08/17, 01:23 am

Hi everyone!

Worked another 11 hour day today.
It is sunny Autumn weather today. Not humid.

I have been married twice and am still married
to my second husband.

I divorced my first husband and he never forgave me.
Even though, he was married to someone before me
and married a third wife after me. (They divorced.)
And he lives with his girlfriend who is 17 years younger than me.
I am the only ex-wife he is angry with.
My children say he never got over me.
But I believe it has more to do with control
and power.
He is the one who left his first wife.
He is the one who left the marriage with his third wife. 
(The wife after me.)

I think he is used to being the one who leaves the marriage
and it didn't sit well with his ego when I left him.

He sent me an email a few years ago saying he just can't forgive me.
I did not answer.

My ex sister-in-law was in town last month
visiting my children. (She is his sister)
She and I like and love each other
and I got together with her at my daughter's house.
She knows she can't really discuss seeing me with her brother
but told me she was determined to see me
and give me a hug. :0)

Then she went on to tell me that her ex-husband
(Her only child's father)
moved to the town where they all live
and goes to some of the family get-togethers now.
Oh my gosh! She says it is so awkward.
But they all make it work for the grandkids.
I'm thankful my ex lives in another state.

Hope everyone has a good rest of your day.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   31/08/17, 09:28 am

I'm also thankful mine doesn't live locally Kerri. I get occasional visits from one of his brothers when he's up this way. I have no idea whether my ex knows he visits or not and don't much care. We don't talk about him at all and it's nice that neither of his brothers blame me in any way for the break up. I don't see the other one but he sends me Christmas and birthday cards with little newsletters in them.

It does sound like it's your ex's ego that's never got over the divorce rather than anything else. 

Busy day today and I need to get moving and go for my regular injection shortly. It's pouring with rain of course.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   31/08/17, 10:23 am

I'm lucky. My ex and I have remained friends and so necessary family get togethers are never uncomfortable.

Apart from the get togethers we don't have to see each other as he lives the other side of the country, but my girls don't have to feel awkward mentioning him or his wife. I always ask after him if they have seen him and he always asks after me.

Our split up was totally down to myself. We were married very young and lasted almost 20 years. His fault was his football and sport. That always came before myself and Sarah. We missed out on so many weekends out and so many holidays simply because he had to play football. I had absolutely no life with him. The only company I ever got was with my Mother, Sisters and their family.

When he wasn't playing, he was at practice, if it wasn't either of those it was him watching it on television, constantly. Dragging him out of the house for any fun was murder and there was no real conversation from him. For years I warned him that if he didn't change I would leave him. He would always say sorry and that he would change, but he never did.

In the end someone came along that stimulated me mentally, and several months after meeting him I had an affair. I then finally realised that if I was willing to have an affair my marriage was over. I then told Bill that I wanted a divorce. We continued to live in the same house but we each had our own rooms as the house was big enough to turn into 2 flats. He had a 2 bedroomed one upstairs and I had the smaller 1 bedroomed downstairs. We shared a kitchen. It made him bitter for a while until he met Dee.

I understand that he is very happy with her and they have now been married for 26 years I think if is. He changed totally after meeting her. Very little sport and they are constantly travelling all over the world with their holidays, including several trips to America.

He and I stagnated as a couple but individually we both had a better life.

I'm finding it fascinating reading about all of your lives.

I want to break out the sewing machine soon so I am going to go around the charity shops looking for good quality material in sheets and duvet covers to see if their is anything I can use.

I also need to get a battery put in an old watch. Even though we have the time contantly with us on our mobile phones I still miss not having a watch on my wrist.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   01/09/17, 11:55 am

It's great that you remain friends especially for the girls. Good when you know you're both happier now too.

I'm just back from grocery shopping. Got to mum's and my niece and her mum were there, then one of my brothers arrived and just when I was about to leave another brother showed up with his six month old Shih Tzu puppy so I had to stay a bit longer of course.

It's actually a lovely, sunny morning. A load of towels I hung out earlier are almost dry. Yay! A complete contrast to yesterday's downpours. I told them all they were going to get nice weather just in time for me to go away. lol It happened last time too. Threw it down for weeks but the day I left it was 85F at Heathrow.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   01/09/17, 06:40 pm


My first ex walked out on me and our 2y old and not only that but we'd only been in Australia for 1 year and were still trying to settle in, make friends etc. We had just moved down south because that is where he found work so me being the good wife, didn't make a fuss and just packed up our brand new house and moved south.

He packed his suit cases and walked away on boxing day and left me with having to pay the bond and rent for the house he had found. I didn't know he hadn't paid anything so when the owner knocked on the door and asked for his money I was shocked.
I found the bank in this new town and went to take out the money to pay for it all but found out there and then that my ex had emptied the bank accounts and left me with 43 cents!
New town, no friends or family and no money, while having a 2y old living in a dump of a rental became my new reality!

Good thing I was stubborn and determined enough to make it work and by golly it was tough and painful but I did it! 

His (old) work mates came and helped out and the mates girl friends/wife's where brilliant and showed me the town and took me to legal aid and social security so that I would have some money to eat at least.

I rented out 2 bedrooms so that sorted out the rent money problem. Then I took any jobs I could get where I could take my daughter with me as I didn't want to leave her.
I picked up old furniture from the kerb, restored it and then sold it as well.
The other thing I did was sew kids clothes and sell it on consignment.

I was determined to make a life in Australia and I damn well did Smile

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   02/09/17, 10:35 am


What a bastard Martha. Good job you were the strong type. I can't imagine what that must have been like for you to survive with a baby in a strange country with no money and no friends.

Evil little shite. I wonder if he ever got his just deserts.

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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   02/09/17, 01:38 pm


Hats off to you Martha. That must have been terrifying. Good to know there are people kind enough to help out though. As for the ex....I hope he burns in Hell. Preferably very slowly.
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PostSubject: Re: August Yacking   03/09/17, 04:18 am

He was a real bastard indeed and refused to see our daughter, even after the courts tried to have him come in. The drama's I went through after he left could almost make a mini series I tell ya.

He didn't want anything to do with his little girl and it wasn't until she was 16 that he made contact with her; wanting to "catch up" where his words. I gave Natasja the choice and she decided she was going to meet him and see what he had to say.
To cut a long story short .... he wanted her to move in with him so they could get to know each other and also because ... and these where his words .... "I see you as a young woman now and you know I could do with a women's touch in this house, to do the cleaning and cooking. Would you like to live with me for a few years?" .... Needless to say Natasja told him exactly what she thought of him and walked away, telling him to never contact her again!

She told me years later that she had seen him at the traffic lights when she stopped for a red light. She said she was so tempted to accidentally hit the accelerator instead of the breaks. lol

I kept in touch with his only brother and wife and hoped this would be enough for Natasja to always know that side of her family. Luckily they kept in touch and her uncle even came over for a visit. They are now in constant contact and she has been to stay with them twice already. At least her uncle can answer any family related stuff such as medical things etc to her.
That brother disowned my ex and even when he was over here, he refused to go and look him up.

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